I did not know I'm dead

Headline: 'There's no money for you - you're dead'
Clip: news.com.au 2.5.9
Caption: I did not know I'm dead

A VICTORIAN pensioner got the fright of his life when he was told by Centrelink workers he was listed as dead.

Clive Norton, 71, was told Centrelink records showed he died on April 8.

"I was pretty upset and just dumbfounded for a while," the Ballarat man said.

His wife, Denise, 61, even received a Centrelink payment for $2292 for funeral expences..

Headline: Husband's 365 nights of birthday sex
Clip: news.com.au 1.5.9
Caption: Sex for a year from dear

A US woman has written a book about the unusual gift she gave her husband for his 40th birthday - 365 nights of sex.
High-flying PR exec Charla Muller, from North Carolina, hit upon the idea for her salesman husband Brad, now 42, and has written a book about the year. Here's some of the excerpts printed in The Sun:

Headline: Barbecue Joint Needs Permit For Busty Mannequin
Clip: news.com.au 1.5.9
Caption: A sign for fines

A man who runs a suburban Cincinnati barbecue joint says the busty mannequin he put out front has been good for business, but city officials say he needs a permit to keep her there. The Design and Review Board in suburban Reading said under city rules, the figure is considered a sign, requiring a permit.

Headline: Man Asks To Join Brother In Jail And Gets His Wish
Clip: news.com.au 1.5.9
Caption: Birds of a feather

Police said a man wanted to go to jail with his arrested brother, so he shoved an officer and got his wish. David Jacob Ginnis, 35, pleaded guilty Wednesday to assault on a police officer and was sentenced to 30 days in jail, with the full sentence suspended.

The Ketchup Caper

Healine: Eccentric Man Found Guilty Of Ketchup Bottle Theft
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 17.4.9
Caption: The Ketchup Caper

An Orange County jury has convicted an eccentric former school board trustee known for espousing conspiracy theories of stealing a bottle of ketchup from a college dining area. The jury found Steve Rocco guilty of misdemeanor petty theft on Thursday after less than a day of deliberation.

Prosecutors accused Rocco of stealing a 14-ounce bottle of ketchup from a Chapman University dining area last year.

Headline: Mass. Driving Instructor Allegedly Drunk During Lesson
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 16.4.9
Caption: An ironic lesson in drinking while driving

NEWBURYPORT, Massachusetts — A driving instructor who police say was drunk while giving someone a driving lesson can stay out of jail but will lose his license for a year.

Daniel Winsky, 53, of Salem was convicted Thursday of operating under the influence while giving a lesson from the passenger seat of a car. He was sentenced to 18 months probation but won't be a licensed driver for one year.

Winsky was not behind the wheel during the December 2007 lesson, but prosecutors say he was in control of the passenger side brakes in the specially-fitted car and also moved the wheel during the lesson.

Headline: Maid 'poisoned' food with menstrual blood
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 16.4.9
Caption: This will make you puke

AN Indonesian maid has appeared in a Hong Kong court accused of adding menstrual blood to her employer's food in an effort to improve their stormy relationship.
Indra Ningsih, aged 26, mixed the blood in a pot of vegetables in the belief that the recipe would help ease her difficult work environment, The Standard newspaper reported.
In some southeast Asian cultures, menstrual blood is thought to have special powers, the paper added.
The maid has been charged with one count of "administering poison or other destructive or noxious substances with intent to injure'' and has not yet entered a plea.
The report cited a prosecution statement that said Ms Ningsih's ingredient had been discovered after her female employer, surnamed Mok, peered through the kitchen door and saw the helper acting suspiciously.
She entered the kitchen and found the accused throwing something into the rubbish bin.
When she checked the pot, she found a suspicious substance mixed with the vegetables and water, the English-language daily said.
Ms Mok later discovered a used sanitary napkin in the bin and called the police.

Headline: Mom Drops $15G on Surgery to Look Like Daughter
Origin of Clip: FOXnews.com 16.4.9
Caption: Mom Becomes Sexy Daughter

At first glance it is hard to tell British mother and daughter Janet and Jane Cunliffe apart. But it is not due to genetics. Mom Janet, 50, has spent almost $15,000 on plastic surgery in an attempt to look identical to her 28-year-old daughter, The Daily Mail reported.

"Seeing how attractive Jane is made me want to get my looks back," Janet told the Mail. "Now instead of mum and daughter we look more like twins. I had good genes and good skin, but I needed a helping hand to make me feel better about myself."

Last September she flew to Croatia to have plastic surgery on her nose and eyes. She also got breast implants and had her lips plumped.

After she added blonde hair extensions she said men would mistake her and Jane for sisters.

Headline: Teen Stabbed to Death by Woman in Wheelchair
Origin of Clip: FOXnews.com 16.4.9
Caption: How?

Los Angeles police say a 15-year-old girl was stabbed to death by a woman in a wheelchair possibly twice her age after the pair got into a fight over a man.

Officer Karen Rayner says officers recieved several reports of the incident Wednesday afternoon on a street in South Los Angeles.

Rayner says "it sounds like it was a donnybrook of a lot of people fighting."

The victim was taken to a hospital where she was pronounced dead

Headline: Man Allegedly Stabs Brother Over Pork And Beans
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 16.4.9
Caption: NO BEANS ABOUT IT

A sheriff's deputy said a 54-year-old man stabbed his 63-year-old brother during an argument in their kitchen over a can of pork and beans. Sheriff's spokeswoman Cindy Chadwick said the suspect was booked Tuesday on one count of aggravated battery.

Chadwick said the brother was treated at a medical center for stab wounds in his left arm and shoulder blade.

NO BEANS ABOUT IT

Headline: Man Allegedly Stabs Brother Over Pork And Beans
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 16.4.9
Caption: NO BEANS ABOUT IT

A sheriff's deputy said a 54-year-old man stabbed his 63-year-old brother during an argument in their kitchen over a can of pork and beans. Sheriff's spokeswoman Cindy Chadwick said the suspect was booked Tuesday on one count of aggravated battery.

Chadwick said the brother was treated at a medical center for stab wounds in his left arm and shoulder blade.

Headline: Man Jailed For Urinating On Woman During Flight
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 15.4.9
Caption: This one is sickly weird

A 28-year-old man has been sentenced to three weeks in jail for urinating on a 66-year-old woman during a Continental Airlines flight last month from Los Angeles to Honolulu. Jerome Kenneth Kingzio, a resident of the U.S. Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands, was sentenced after pleading guilty Tuesday to assault charges in federal court in Honolulu.

The victim was headed to Hawaii on March 21 for a scuba diving vacation and was watching an in-flight movie when Kingzio stood up and began urinating on her. He had been drinking on the flight.

Headline: Police Say 'doc' Used Vet Gear To Perform Implants
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 15.4.9
Caption: Doggy Style Breast Implants

A Spanish man accused of using veterinary equipment to perform cosmetic surgery is in the doghouse. Catalonian regional police said they arrested the 63-year-old Barcelona native for allegedly practicing medicine without a license in filthy conditions at his home.
The police said in a statement released Wednesday that the man charged his human patients between euro250 and euro500 ($330 to $660) to perform breast or buttocks implants and used a veterinary tool normally used to inject animals.

Headline: Woman: Why My Husband Donated His Face
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 15.4.9
Caption: Changing face

The wife of a Massachusetts man whose tissue was donated for the nation's second face transplant said her husband told her before heart transplant surgery that he wanted to donate his organs if he didn't survive the operation.

Susan Whitman told The Boston Globe for a story in Wednesday's editions that she was surprised, however, when organ bank officials asked if she would approve of the donation of Joseph Helfgot's face.

PHOTOS: FACE TRANSPLANTS (WARNING: Contains some graphic photos)

Whitman and their four children held a conference call and quickly agreed it was the "right thing to do."

Helfgot, 60, learned to appreciate the value of life from his Holocaust survivor parents, friends and family said.

Headline: Doctors 'find tree in man's lung'
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: Excuse me sir, you seem to have a tree growing inside you.

SURPRISED surgeons performing a lung cancer operation apparently found a 5cm fir tree growing inside the patient.
The Daily Mail reports doctors thought Russian man Artyom Sidorkin, 28, had a tumour after he complained of extreme pain in his chest and had been coughing up blood.

The x-ray image shows what looks like a large tumour in his lung.

During the operation, surgeon Vladimir Kamashev said he thought he was hallucinating when he saw the fir tree needles inside the tissue.

Medical staff said the 5cm tree is too big to be swallowed and believe Mr Sidorkin had inhaled a seed which later sprouted.

Headline: Mums and babies break out of jail
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: The Great Escape

SIX mothers escaped with their newborn babies from a prison maternity ward, say authorities in the Brazilian city of Sao Paulo.

The fugitive mothers were recaptured after they used improvised knives to overpower guards and drugged guard dogs to flee the secure facility, Associated Press reports.

This one is sickly weird - man pees on woman during flight

Headline: Man Jailed For Urinating On Woman During Flight
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 15.4.9
Caption: This one is sickly weird

A 28-year-old man has been sentenced to three weeks in jail for urinating on a 66-year-old woman during a Continental Airlines flight last month from Los Angeles to Honolulu. Jerome Kenneth Kingzio, a resident of the U.S. Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands, was sentenced after pleading guilty Tuesday to assault charges in federal court in Honolulu.

The victim was headed to Hawaii on March 21 for a scuba diving vacation and was watching an in-flight movie when Kingzio stood up and began urinating on her. He had been drinking on the flight.

Headline: Police Say 'doc' Used Vet Gear To Perform Implants
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 15.4.9
Caption: Doggy Style Breast Implants

A Spanish man accused of using veterinary equipment to perform cosmetic surgery is in the doghouse. Catalonian regional police said they arrested the 63-year-old Barcelona native for allegedly practicing medicine without a license in filthy conditions at his home.
The police said in a statement released Wednesday that the man charged his human patients between euro250 and euro500 ($330 to $660) to perform breast or buttocks implants and used a veterinary tool normally used to inject animals.

Headline: Woman: Why My Husband Donated His Face
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 15.4.9
Caption: Changing face

The wife of a Massachusetts man whose tissue was donated for the nation's second face transplant said her husband told her before heart transplant surgery that he wanted to donate his organs if he didn't survive the operation.

Susan Whitman told The Boston Globe for a story in Wednesday's editions that she was surprised, however, when organ bank officials asked if she would approve of the donation of Joseph Helfgot's face.

PHOTOS: FACE TRANSPLANTS (WARNING: Contains some graphic photos)

Whitman and their four children held a conference call and quickly agreed it was the "right thing to do."

Helfgot, 60, learned to appreciate the value of life from his Holocaust survivor parents, friends and family said.

Headline: Doctors 'find tree in man's lung'
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: Excuse me sir, you seem to have a tree growing inside you.

SURPRISED surgeons performing a lung cancer operation apparently found a 5cm fir tree growing inside the patient.
The Daily Mail reports doctors thought Russian man Artyom Sidorkin, 28, had a tumour after he complained of extreme pain in his chest and had been coughing up blood.

The x-ray image shows what looks like a large tumour in his lung.

During the operation, surgeon Vladimir Kamashev said he thought he was hallucinating when he saw the fir tree needles inside the tissue.

Medical staff said the 5cm tree is too big to be swallowed and believe Mr Sidorkin had inhaled a seed which later sprouted.

Headline: Mums and babies break out of jail
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: The Great Escape

SIX mothers escaped with their newborn babies from a prison maternity ward, say authorities in the Brazilian city of Sao Paulo.

The fugitive mothers were recaptured after they used improvised knives to overpower guards and drugged guard dogs to flee the secure facility, Associated Press reports.

Headline: Woman's 'mid-air sex romp' next to son
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 14.4.9
Caption: Sex Education

A MOTHER accused of having a mid-air sex romp with another woman's boyfriend reportedly had her young son beside her at the time.
Clare Irby, 29, allegedly pleasured Daniel Melia, 36, under a blanket as his drunken model girlfriend lay passed out next to them, The Sun reported.

Clare’s son James, two, was said to be curled up alongside on the Bangalore-Heathrow flight. It is believed he was asleep.

Model Sarah Hannon, 35, screamed as she woke up and found the pair being stopped in the act by hostesses.

The trio were arrested at Heathrow and child care was found for James.

Ms Irby and student Mr Melia, 36 were arrested for gross indecency, while Ms Hannon was held for being drunk on an aircraft.

Headline: Money Stuffed in Bra Saves Woman From Bullet
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: A Real Wonder Bra

A Brazilian woman survived being shot in the chest Saturday by robbers because cash she had stashed in her bra absorbed the impact of the bullet, the Telegraph reported.

Ivonete Pereira, 58, was riding a bus in the northeast Brazilian state of Bahia when it was held up by armed robbers.

Aware of frequent highway robberies, Pereira had stuffed $67 in cash in the left cup of her bra.

During a shootout with a police officer, a stray bullet hit Pereira in the chest.

The cash was enough to absorb enough impact of the bullet to save her life. She was still taken to the hospital to have the bullet removed.

Headline: Husband 'fleeced wife using spy lies'
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: Fleeced right down to the budgie

A MAN allegedly fleeced his new wife of her life savings before telling her she faced being killed by ASIO.

Single mother Karen Roberts believed she had met the man of her dreams when she bumped into Wayne David Charters at the Ulysses Motorcycle Club at Mornington, south of Melbourne, in February 2003.

They shared an interest in dolphins, motorcycle riding, art and spirituality.

The Melbourne Magistrates Court was told today that Ms Roberts believed her new partner lived an exciting double life as an ASIO agent whose cover was to work as a carpet layer in suburban Melbourne.

Within a few months the couple was married and Mr Charters allegedly convinced Ms Roberts to sell everything she owned so they could relocate overseas.

Ms Roberts obliged and in statements tendered to the court she described selling her house, which she believes was valued at $280,000, her car and even a pet budgie.

Headline: Girl Born 22 Years After Father's Sperm Frozen
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: How old is the girl in 'sperm years'?

A former leukemia patient who had his sperm frozen as a teenager has fathered a baby after doctors successfully thawed his sample a record 22 years later.

Chris Biblis was 16 when doctors told him that he needed radiotherapy that would leave him sterile and recommended before going ahead with the life-saving treatment that they put a sample of his sperm into cryogenic storage for future use.

Now aged 38, he is celebrating the birth of a healthy baby daughter, Stella, who was conceived after scientists injected a defrosted sperm into an egg from his wife, Melodie, and implanted it in her uterus.

The 22-year lapse between storage in April 1986 and conception in June 2008 is a world record, according to specialists at the U.S. fertility clinic who carried out the procedure.

Headline: Passenger lands plane after pilot dies
Origin of Clip: CNN.com 13.4.9
Caption: You Can Fly

It's a nightmarish scenario straight out of the movies: A passenger is forced to land a plane after its pilot becomes incapacitated. But it became a reality for a passenger on board a plane over Florida on Sunday, and for the air traffic controllers who helped him land safely in what the National Air Traffic Controllers'

Headline: Norwegian sex at 100mph
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption: Speed Sex 100MPH

The unnamed couple, a 28-year-old man and a 22-year-old woman, were caught in the act late on Easter Sunday by traffic police on the E18 highway, some 25 miles west of Oslo.

Officers who clocked the couple's silver Mazda 323 racing at 133 kilometres per hour in a 100 zone realised they were doing more than just breaking the speed limit, police told AFP.

It was veering from one side to the other because the woman was sitting on the man's lap while he was driving and doing the act, shall we say," said Tor Stein Hagen, a superintendent with Soendre Buskerund district police.

"He couldn't see much because her back was in the way," he added.

"Why they did it on a highway with such a high risk we don't know."

After following the couple for nearly a kilometre, officers pulled the car over at a service station.

"We have taken away his driving licence because of the danger that he caused," Mr Hagen said.

Headline: Bomb Squad Called In to Defuse ... Prosthetic Leg
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption:

HILLSBORO, Ore. — A scary situation turned into a strange one when a bomb squad determined that a suspicious package left outside the Washington County Sheriff's Office contained a prosthetic leg.

Sheriff's Sgt. Vance Stimler said deputies called the Portland bomb squad out to Hillsboro Sunday afternoon after noticing a canvas bag with a cylinder-shaped object sticking out.

Excuse me sir, you seem to have a tree growing inside you.

Headline: Doctors 'find tree in man's lung'
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: Excuse me sir, you seem to have a tree growing inside you.

SURPRISED surgeons performing a lung cancer operation apparently found a 5cm fir tree growing inside the patient.
The Daily Mail reports doctors thought Russian man Artyom Sidorkin, 28, had a tumour after he complained of extreme pain in his chest and had been coughing up blood.

The x-ray image shows what looks like a large tumour in his lung.

During the operation, surgeon Vladimir Kamashev said he thought he was hallucinating when he saw the fir tree needles inside the tissue.

Medical staff said the 5cm tree is too big to be swallowed and believe Mr Sidorkin had inhaled a seed which later sprouted.

Headline: Mums and babies break out of jail
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 15.4.9
Caption: The Great Escape

SIX mothers escaped with their newborn babies from a prison maternity ward, say authorities in the Brazilian city of Sao Paulo.

The fugitive mothers were recaptured after they used improvised knives to overpower guards and drugged guard dogs to flee the secure facility, Associated Press reports.

Headline: Woman's 'mid-air sex romp' next to son
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 14.4.9
Caption: Sex Education

A MOTHER accused of having a mid-air sex romp with another woman's boyfriend reportedly had her young son beside her at the time.
Clare Irby, 29, allegedly pleasured Daniel Melia, 36, under a blanket as his drunken model girlfriend lay passed out next to them, The Sun reported.

Clare’s son James, two, was said to be curled up alongside on the Bangalore-Heathrow flight. It is believed he was asleep.

Model Sarah Hannon, 35, screamed as she woke up and found the pair being stopped in the act by hostesses.

The trio were arrested at Heathrow and child care was found for James.

Ms Irby and student Mr Melia, 36 were arrested for gross indecency, while Ms Hannon was held for being drunk on an aircraft.

Headline: Money Stuffed in Bra Saves Woman From Bullet
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: A Real Wonder Bra

A Brazilian woman survived being shot in the chest Saturday by robbers because cash she had stashed in her bra absorbed the impact of the bullet, the Telegraph reported.

Ivonete Pereira, 58, was riding a bus in the northeast Brazilian state of Bahia when it was held up by armed robbers.

Aware of frequent highway robberies, Pereira had stuffed $67 in cash in the left cup of her bra.

During a shootout with a police officer, a stray bullet hit Pereira in the chest.

The cash was enough to absorb enough impact of the bullet to save her life. She was still taken to the hospital to have the bullet removed.

Headline: Husband 'fleeced wife using spy lies'
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: Fleeced right down to the budgie

A MAN allegedly fleeced his new wife of her life savings before telling her she faced being killed by ASIO.

Single mother Karen Roberts believed she had met the man of her dreams when she bumped into Wayne David Charters at the Ulysses Motorcycle Club at Mornington, south of Melbourne, in February 2003.

They shared an interest in dolphins, motorcycle riding, art and spirituality.

The Melbourne Magistrates Court was told today that Ms Roberts believed her new partner lived an exciting double life as an ASIO agent whose cover was to work as a carpet layer in suburban Melbourne.

Within a few months the couple was married and Mr Charters allegedly convinced Ms Roberts to sell everything she owned so they could relocate overseas.

Ms Roberts obliged and in statements tendered to the court she described selling her house, which she believes was valued at $280,000, her car and even a pet budgie.

Headline: Girl Born 22 Years After Father's Sperm Frozen
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: How old is the girl in 'sperm years'?

A former leukemia patient who had his sperm frozen as a teenager has fathered a baby after doctors successfully thawed his sample a record 22 years later.

Chris Biblis was 16 when doctors told him that he needed radiotherapy that would leave him sterile and recommended before going ahead with the life-saving treatment that they put a sample of his sperm into cryogenic storage for future use.

Now aged 38, he is celebrating the birth of a healthy baby daughter, Stella, who was conceived after scientists injected a defrosted sperm into an egg from his wife, Melodie, and implanted it in her uterus.

The 22-year lapse between storage in April 1986 and conception in June 2008 is a world record, according to specialists at the U.S. fertility clinic who carried out the procedure.

Headline: Passenger lands plane after pilot dies
Origin of Clip: CNN.com 13.4.9
Caption: You Can Fly

It's a nightmarish scenario straight out of the movies: A passenger is forced to land a plane after its pilot becomes incapacitated. But it became a reality for a passenger on board a plane over Florida on Sunday, and for the air traffic controllers who helped him land safely in what the National Air Traffic Controllers'

Headline: Norwegian sex at 100mph
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption: Speed Sex 100MPH

The unnamed couple, a 28-year-old man and a 22-year-old woman, were caught in the act late on Easter Sunday by traffic police on the E18 highway, some 25 miles west of Oslo.

Officers who clocked the couple's silver Mazda 323 racing at 133 kilometres per hour in a 100 zone realised they were doing more than just breaking the speed limit, police told AFP.

It was veering from one side to the other because the woman was sitting on the man's lap while he was driving and doing the act, shall we say," said Tor Stein Hagen, a superintendent with Soendre Buskerund district police.

"He couldn't see much because her back was in the way," he added.

"Why they did it on a highway with such a high risk we don't know."

After following the couple for nearly a kilometre, officers pulled the car over at a service station.

"We have taken away his driving licence because of the danger that he caused," Mr Hagen said.

Headline: Bomb Squad Called In to Defuse ... Prosthetic Leg
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption:

HILLSBORO, Ore. — A scary situation turned into a strange one when a bomb squad determined that a suspicious package left outside the Washington County Sheriff's Office contained a prosthetic leg.

Sheriff's Sgt. Vance Stimler said deputies called the Portland bomb squad out to Hillsboro Sunday afternoon after noticing a canvas bag with a cylinder-shaped object sticking out.

Fleeced right down to the budgie

Headline: Husband 'fleeced wife using spy lies'
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: Fleeced right down to the budgie

A MAN allegedly fleeced his new wife of her life savings before telling her she faced being killed by ASIO.

Single mother Karen Roberts believed she had met the man of her dreams when she bumped into Wayne David Charters at the Ulysses Motorcycle Club at Mornington, south of Melbourne, in February 2003.

They shared an interest in dolphins, motorcycle riding, art and spirituality.

The Melbourne Magistrates Court was told today that Ms Roberts believed her new partner lived an exciting double life as an ASIO agent whose cover was to work as a carpet layer in suburban Melbourne.

Within a few months the couple was married and Mr Charters allegedly convinced Ms Roberts to sell everything she owned so they could relocate overseas.

Ms Roberts obliged and in statements tendered to the court she described selling her house, which she believes was valued at $280,000, her car and even a pet budgie.

Headline: Girl Born 22 Years After Father's Sperm Frozen
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 14.4.9
Caption: How old is the girl in 'sperm years'?

A former leukemia patient who had his sperm frozen as a teenager has fathered a baby after doctors successfully thawed his sample a record 22 years later.

Chris Biblis was 16 when doctors told him that he needed radiotherapy that would leave him sterile and recommended before going ahead with the life-saving treatment that they put a sample of his sperm into cryogenic storage for future use.

Now aged 38, he is celebrating the birth of a healthy baby daughter, Stella, who was conceived after scientists injected a defrosted sperm into an egg from his wife, Melodie, and implanted it in her uterus.

The 22-year lapse between storage in April 1986 and conception in June 2008 is a world record, according to specialists at the U.S. fertility clinic who carried out the procedure.

Headline: Passenger lands plane after pilot dies
Origin of Clip: CNN.com 13.4.9
Caption: You Can Fly

It's a nightmarish scenario straight out of the movies: A passenger is forced to land a plane after its pilot becomes incapacitated. But it became a reality for a passenger on board a plane over Florida on Sunday, and for the air traffic controllers who helped him land safely in what the National Air Traffic Controllers'

Headline: Norwegian sex at 100mph
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption: Speed Sex 100MPH

The unnamed couple, a 28-year-old man and a 22-year-old woman, were caught in the act late on Easter Sunday by traffic police on the E18 highway, some 25 miles west of Oslo.

Officers who clocked the couple's silver Mazda 323 racing at 133 kilometres per hour in a 100 zone realised they were doing more than just breaking the speed limit, police told AFP.

It was veering from one side to the other because the woman was sitting on the man's lap while he was driving and doing the act, shall we say," said Tor Stein Hagen, a superintendent with Soendre Buskerund district police.

"He couldn't see much because her back was in the way," he added.

"Why they did it on a highway with such a high risk we don't know."

After following the couple for nearly a kilometre, officers pulled the car over at a service station.

"We have taken away his driving licence because of the danger that he caused," Mr Hagen said.

Headline: Bomb Squad Called In to Defuse ... Prosthetic Leg
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 13.4.9
Caption: Just a Leg

HILLSBORO, Ore. — A scary situation turned into a strange one when a bomb squad determined that a suspicious package left outside the Washington County Sheriff's Office contained a prosthetic leg.

Sheriff's Sgt. Vance Stimler said deputies called the Portland bomb squad out to Hillsboro Sunday afternoon after noticing a canvas bag with a cylinder-shaped object sticking out.

A busy dude who has not heard of birth control

Headline: Dad Owes $530G for 14 Kids With Different Women
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 12.4.9
Caption: A busy dude who has not heard of birth control

FLINT, Mich. — Authorities in Michigan say a man fathered 14 children with different women and owes more than $530,000 in unpaid child support.

The Flint Journal reports 42-year-old Thomas Frazier was jailed Thursday. Court records say he owes six years of support payments.

The newspaper says the unemployed man could be held for 90 days if he doesn't pay $27,900.

Frazier says he thinks he fathered only three of the children and that it's unrealistic for authorities to expect him to pay child support that was $3,000 a month at one point.

Headline: Government 'should allow sex job ads'
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 12.4.9
Caption: Advertise for sex industry job

THE GOVERNMENT should lift a ban on sex industry job advertisements, according to advocates.

Michelle, who operates one of the Northern Territory's biggest escort services, said the Federal Government ban on advertising work in the "adult retail industry" was unfair.

The Government is spending $4 billion on creating jobs.

Australian Sex Party convenor Fiona Patten said escort agencies and brothels "couldn't even advertise for a cleaner or an accountant" through government offices, the NT News reports.

Michelle said the ban should be lifted, even though she had doubts about luring women into the sex industry.

"As the operator of an escort agency, I agree," she said.

"But as a mother, I have my doubts."

She said "girls" had trouble getting out of the sex business because the money was so good.
Courier Mail, 26 Feb 2009 "Girls earning $500 a night find it hard to go back to a job paying $500 a week.

"It's shocking hours and you have to put up with a lot of crap, but it's still worth it.

Headline: Cops: Sitter Slept in Bathroom as Kid Walked Street
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 11.4.9
Caption: Stupid Ass

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. — Authorities say a Treasure Coast woman fell asleep in the bathroom while a toddler she was supposed to be watching wandered the street.

Port St. Lucie police say the 2-year-old boy was found on a canal bank Friday with two alligators in the water. When police searched the babysitter's home, officers say they found 26-year-old Brandy Lynn Albright asleep on the toilet.

Officers also found an Oxycodone prescription bottle with 11 pills.

Headline: Woman tracks down burglar with dodgy ad
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 11.4.9
Caption: Wanted: One Thief

A JUDGE has praised the efforts of a woman who turned detective to track down a member of a burglary gang after her home was robbed.
In the District Court in Brisbane, Judge Warren Howell sentenced William John Suey to five and a half years jail.

At the sentence hearing Judge Howell paid tribute to one of the victims, The Courier-Mail reports.

The woman, who lost $60,000 in property, was upset at losing some expensive dinner sets and placed an advertisement in The Courier-Mail's Weekend Shopper pretending to look for a similar set.

One of the replies led her to a home where she recognised her dinner set and other property.

Police were called and were able to trace the stolen goods to Suey and the robbery ring.

Suey, 54, made national headlines in April last year when he failed to return after a lunch break in his trial, as the Crown was preparing to cross-examine him.

Headline: Priest Runs Over Worshipers After Good Friday Service
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 9.4.9
Caption: God's Wrath?

FOREST HILLS, Pa. — Authorities and witnesses say a woman lost her leg and at least five other people were injured when a priest drove into a group of people after a Good Friday service in western Pennsylvania.

The crash happened in the parking lot of St. Maurice Catholic Church in Forest Hills, just east of Pittsburgh.

Authorities and witnesses say the priest drove into a group of people on a patio where older people typically wait for rides.

Angela Thomas, a nurse and parishioner, says she saw the woman's severed leg and gave her belt to use as a tourniquet. She also tended to a man pinned under the car.

Thomas says the priest told her the accelerator just went.

Headline: Punished for Praying
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 9.4.9
Caption: When Praying is a Sin

Two California students can sue their community college district after their school threatened to suspend them for praying on campus, a federal judge ruled.

Kandy Kyriacou and Ojoma Omaga said the College of Alameda accused them of "disruptive behavior" after they had prayed with an ailing teacher in a faculty office in December of 2007, according to the San Francisco Chronicle.

The students said the school issued suspension notices to them.

Although public colleges are prohibited from endorsing religion, U.S. District Judge Susan Illston ruled that the women can proceed with a lawsuit against Peralta Community College District.

Illston said college students have the right to pray in private outside the classroom, according to the Chronicle.

The lawsuit seeks an acknowledgment of that right and an apology, and wants all disciplinary action be rescinded, said one of the pair's lawyers, Steven Wood.

Headline: Environmental Agency Offices Pollute Wash. Creek
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 9.4.9
Caption: Proof that the environment has not got a chance

Washington state environmental regulators say they've finally found the source of pollution that has been fouling a creek near Vancouver Lake: the agency's own sewer pipes.

City workers have discovered that an office building's sewer line was mistakenly connected to a storm drain, rather than the municipal sewer main.

The 1970s-vintage building houses Washington state Department of Ecology regional offices, as well as those of the Department of Fish and Game and U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.

Headline: Church's 'No More Christians' Signs Get Attention
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 9.4.9
Caption: Say What! OMG

A Florida church is trying to persuade people to return to worship with a provocative campaign that has raised a few eyebrows around town.

The Mosaic Church of Crestview, a non-denominational Christian church, used the slogan "No More Christians" to spark conversation and attract the attention of people who have grown lackadaisical in their religious practice, the Crestview News Bulletin reported.

The campaign advertises a series of discussions with names like "Why you should be an atheist instead of a Christian" and "Why you should be a Muslim instead of a Christian."

Mosaic Church Pastor James Ross said the discussions are meant to "creatively and aggressively try to show (people) that God loves them so much that even though they are still sinners, Christ died for them," the News Bulletin reported.

Headline: Duo Accused Of Trying To Steal Restaurant Grease
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 9.4.9
Caption: All Greased Up

Two Detroit-area men face larceny and trespassing charges after authorities say they tried to steal used restaurant grease. Westland police Sgt. Steve Borisch said 52-year-old Christopher Kind and 44-year-old Richard Tallent were arrested early Tuesday at a restaurant in the city 10 miles west of Detroit.

Borisch said an employee of a business that collects and recycles grease under contract with area restaurants had blocked the two with his truck. He told police 1,000 pounds of grease worth about $160 had been drained from a nearby eatery's grease tank.

Headline: Divorce Court No Place For Frozen Dog Sperm Flap
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 9.4.9
Caption: Going once, going twice, going three times. The sperm goes to you

The judge wondered if she was an unwitting participant in an episode of "Candid Camera" or "Punk'd." Oakland County Family Court Judge Cheryl Matthews wasn't. She just had a front-bench seat Wednesday for a feud between a divorced couple over who gets frozen sperm from bull mastiffs they bred in happier times.

When Anthony and Karen Scully split in 2002, they divvied up the six bull mastiffs they owned. He kept four; she took two. Now, they're fighting over who owns the semen from Cyrus, Regg and Romeo that's being stored at a center in Sterling Heights.

Tell us another one dude

Headline: Man Decides To Clean With Gasoline While Smoking
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 7.4.9
Caption: Tell us another one dude

A man faces an arson charge after telling authorities he wasn't thinking when he decided to use gasoline for cleaning up his apartment, and then tossed a lit cigarette into a pile of gas-soaked cushions and clothes. A criminal complaint filed Monday quoted a 47-year-old man as saying he knew gasoline is flammable and never should have used it.

The complaint said that when the fire began Friday, he didn't pull the fire alarm but instead shouted "fire" a couple times and walked to the Menasha police department for an ambulance to take him to the hospital where he was treated for burns.

Headline: Officer Tickets Parked Car as Woman Lies Dead Inside
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 7.4.9
Caption: Stiff Gets Ticket

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — A parking enforcement officer issued a ticket for a pickup truck outside an Alabama emergency room while a woman lay dead inside the vehicle, authorities said.

Rebecca Kate Haley, 25, had been dead for at least seven hours when an illegal parking ticket was put on the windshield, authorities said.

Police spokesman Sgt. Johnny Williams Jr. said the officer didn't see Haley because she was slumped over in the truck's cab. Drug paraphernalia was found in the truck.

Williams said Tuesday that Haley's cause of death had not been determined.

About an hour after the ticket was issued at 10:15 a.m. Monday outside the UAB hospital, a passer-by spotted Haley.

Headline: Missing: $1,200 Worth Of Lip Gloss
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 7.4.9
Caption: Look for the woman with the glossy lips

Here's some lip gloss that's really hot. Police want to know who made off with 74 tubes of "Beauty Rush" _ worth about $1,200 _ from a suburban New York Victoria's Secret store. Clarkstown police believe the cosmetics went missing from a bin sometime Saturday. The store, in the Nanuet Mall, reported the theft on Sunday.

Police are reviewing surveillance footage for clues.

Headline: Man admits grabbing breasts
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 7.4.9
Caption: Man at tracks grabs racks

A MAN who grabbed the breasts of two women at the Wellard and Rockingham train stations has pleaded guilty to indecent assault.

The 20-year-old Rockingham man pleaded guilty to the attacks and will reappear in Rockingham Magistrate's Court for a pre-sentence report on May 8.

My Bonny Lies Over The Ocean or we should say The Man Lies Over The Bonnet

Headline: Man clings to car bonnet for 4kms
Origin of Clip: canada.com 5.4.9
Caption: My Bonny Lies Over The Ocean or we should say The Man Lies Over The Bonnet

A MAN had to cling to the bonnet of a car for four kilometres as its driver allegedly attempted to throw him off during a road rage incident in Sydney.
NSW Police said the 30-year-old man and his wife were travelling along Parramatta Road at Concord in Sydney's inner west at 8.20pm (AEDT) last night when they were involved in a minor collision with a Peugeot hatchback.

After the Peugeot failed to stop, the couple caught up with it further along Parramatta Road, where they stopped and approached the vehicle while it was stuck in heavy traffic.

The driver of the Peugeot then allegedly began to drive at the couple, forcing the man onto the bonnet.

Headline: Drive-thru nude at Tim Hortons
Origin of Clip: canada.com 4.4.9
Caption: Nude at Hortons

Defying conventional wisdom about the dangers of mixing hot beverages and naked bodies, a man showed up skin to seat at a Tim Hortons drive-through Thursday morning. "My understanding is a gentleman came through the drive-through operating a mini-van wearing nothing but a smile," said Sgt. David Cowan of Saint John police. Police were called, but the clothing-liberated driver had already driven away. Cowan said he didn't know if the driver got his coffee.

Headline: It's official - you look like your dog
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 4.4.9
Caption: That wasn't me that was my dog

SCIENTISTS have proved it is possible to match a person to their dog just by their appearance.

And the study suggests a possible reason - people are drawn to pets with similar physical attributes.

Men and women shown pictures of dog owners and asked to guess whether they had a labrador, poodle or staffordshire bull terrier fared almost twice as well as would be expected by chance.

Researchers at Britain's Bath Spa University first set out to see if dogs and their masters had similar personalities.

Headline: Va. Boy Takes Truck, Horses to Texas Rodeo
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 3.4.9
Caption: It was the cowboy in him

A 13-year-old Virginia boy apparently loaded his family's pickup truck with food, clothes and his dog, hitched up a trailer with two horses in tow and drove nearly 1,300 miles to Texas, police said. The teen's parents found him safe Friday.

Police are unsure why the boy ran away Wednesday morning from his Jetersville-area home. He apparently was well-prepared, even bringing extra propane tanks along.

Wyatt E. McLaughlin was found about 2 p.m. Friday on a rodeo grounds near Weatherford, Texas, where he had performed several times before. His parents looked for him there on a hunch, said Sgt. Tom Cunningham, a Virginia State Police spokesman.

Headline: No more fishing, says man speared in head
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 3.4.9
Caption: What a headache

A BRAZILIAN man says he is done with underwater fishing after an accident left him with a spear embedded 15cm into his skull.

Doctors removed the spear from Emerson de Oliveira Abreu's brain and said he would have died had it entered his skull at a different angle, The Associated Press reports.

Mr Aberu is now in a stable condition and said he would "never more" fish with spears.

Mr Abreu told Globo TV he felt "a sharp pain" after the spear hit a rock and bounced back into his head just above his left eye.

He described the pain he felt every time he touched the spear or when the ambulance hit bumps in the road as unbearable...

Headline: Pill that can cure shoplifters
Origin of Clip: telegraph.co.uk 3.4.9
Caption: Sex Cereal

They found the drug naltrexone helped take away the "thrill" that drives some kleptomaniacs to steal.
"It gets rid of that rush and desire," said Dr Jon Grant, of the University of Minnesota in America, who led the study.
Writing in the Journal of Biological Psychiatry, Dr Grant and colleagues said they tested 25 patients who spent an average of at least one hour a week stealing.
Dr Grant said that these are people who steal "even though they can easily afford not to", and that they are troubled by their behaviour.
Over eight weeks some of the volunteers took naltrexone, while the others took a placebo or dummy drug.

What a Headache

Headline: No more fishing, says man speared in head
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 3.4.9
Caption: What a headache

A BRAZILIAN man says he is done with underwater fishing after an accident left him with a spear embedded 15cm into his skull.

Doctors removed the spear from Emerson de Oliveira Abreu's brain and said he would have died had it entered his skull at a different angle, The Associated Press reports.

Mr Aberu is now in a stable condition and said he would "never more" fish with spears.

Mr Abreu told Globo TV he felt "a sharp pain" after the spear hit a rock and bounced back into his head just above his left eye.

He described the pain he felt every time he touched the spear or when the ambulance hit bumps in the road as unbearable...

Headline: Pill that can cure shoplifters
Origin of Clip: telegraph.co.uk 3.4.9
Caption: Sex Cereal

They found the drug naltrexone helped take away the "thrill" that drives some kleptomaniacs to steal.
"It gets rid of that rush and desire," said Dr Jon Grant, of the University of Minnesota in America, who led the study.
Writing in the Journal of Biological Psychiatry, Dr Grant and colleagues said they tested 25 patients who spent an average of at least one hour a week stealing.
Dr Grant said that these are people who steal "even though they can easily afford not to", and that they are troubled by their behaviour.
Over eight weeks some of the volunteers took naltrexone, while the others took a placebo or dummy drug.

Headline: Cereal Box Typo Sends Callers To Phone Sex Line
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 3.4.9
Caption: Sex Cereal

An Oregon company has ordered new packaging for its Peace Cereal after a typo on the box sent callers to a phone sex line instead of the cereal maker's 800 number. Instead of reaching Golden Temple of Oregon, callers were greeted by a recorded voice asking, "Do you love sex? ... Isn't that why you called?"

Spokeswoman Elissa Brown said Eugene, Ore.-based Golden Temple ordered new packaging when the mistake was discovered in December and new boxes have been shipping out for weeks.

Headline: Man cuts his own throat - from the inside
Origin of Clip: news.com 3.4.9
Caption: The Bloke is a Real Cut-up

A DINER tried to use a pair of nail scissors as a toothpick but swallowed them when he laughed at a friend's joke and they stuck in his throat.

Kong Lin, 27, tried to cough up the clippers but they skewered the inside of his throat because the points were facing upwards.

Doctors managed to remove the scissors in a 30-minute operation under local anaesthetic in Putian, eastern China, The Sun reports.

Headline: Cops: Mom Drugged Daughter, 13, to Get Her Pregnant
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 2.4.9
Caption: Mom Drugs daughter so BF could screw her

UNIONTOWN, Pa. — Police say a western Pennsylvania mother drugged her 13-year-old daughter so her boyfriend could get the girl pregnant.

Uniontown police say 32-year-old Shana Brown is no longer able to have children, but wanted a baby with her boyfriend.

Det. Donald Gmitter says Brown and her boyfriend, 40-year-old Duane Calloway, attempted to impregnate the girl on three occasions. Gmitter says the girl prevented the rapes. The girl's paternal grandmother reported the incidents to police.

Brown is facing several charges, including endangering the welfare of children. Brown's attorney Patrick McDaniel did not immediately return a call for comment.Mom Drugs daughter so BF could screw her

Headline: Nurse Charged for Injecting 10 Patients With Bleach
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 2.4.9
Caption: Nurse wanted them clean inside and out

LUFKIN, Texas — A former nurse has been charged with injecting 10 patients with bleach — killing five of them — at a dialysis center in Lufkin.
Kimberly Saenz has been indicted by an Angelina County grand jury on one count of capital murder and five counts of aggravated assault.
She's charged with injecting bleach into the blood stream of her dialysis patients over a span of four weeks last April.
DaVita, which runs the clinic, says the indictments were a "painful reminder" of the deaths that unfolded last year.
Saenz was charged last May with two counts of aggravated assault for injecting bleach into two patients. Both lived.
The 35-year-old wasn't charged in any deaths until this week's indictments, which link her to five deaths

Headline: Woman Follows GPS, Gets Stuck In Snowmobile Trail
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 2.4.9
Caption: At least the GPS system did not send her over a cliff

A motorist relying on a GPS navigation unit found out the hard way that technology is not always the answer. Sheriff's officials said a woman was driving when the best routing from the GPS sent her onto a road that forked into a snowmobile trail. Several miles down the frozen path she stopped and couldn't turn around in about a foot and a half of snow surrounding the car. ..

The Bloke is a Real Cutup

Headline: Man cuts his own throat - from the inside
Origin of Clip: news.com 3.4.9
Caption: The Bloke is a Real Cut-up

A DINER tried to use a pair of nail scissors as a toothpick but swallowed them when he laughed at a friend's joke and they stuck in his throat.

Kong Lin, 27, tried to cough up the clippers but they skewered the inside of his throat because the points were facing upwards.

Doctors managed to remove the scissors in a 30-minute operation under local anaesthetic in Putian, eastern China, The Sun reports.

Headline: Cops: Mom Drugged Daughter, 13, to Get Her Pregnant
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 2.4.9
Caption: Mom Drugs daughter so BF could screw her

UNIONTOWN, Pa. — Police say a western Pennsylvania mother drugged her 13-year-old daughter so her boyfriend could get the girl pregnant.

Uniontown police say 32-year-old Shana Brown is no longer able to have children, but wanted a baby with her boyfriend.

Det. Donald Gmitter says Brown and her boyfriend, 40-year-old Duane Calloway, attempted to impregnate the girl on three occasions. Gmitter says the girl prevented the rapes. The girl's paternal grandmother reported the incidents to police.

Brown is facing several charges, including endangering the welfare of children. Brown's attorney Patrick McDaniel did not immediately return a call for comment.Mom Drugs daughter so BF could screw her

Headline: Nurse Charged for Injecting 10 Patients With Bleach
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 2.4.9
Caption: Nurse wanted them clean inside and out

LUFKIN, Texas — A former nurse has been charged with injecting 10 patients with bleach — killing five of them — at a dialysis center in Lufkin.
Kimberly Saenz has been indicted by an Angelina County grand jury on one count of capital murder and five counts of aggravated assault.
She's charged with injecting bleach into the blood stream of her dialysis patients over a span of four weeks last April.
DaVita, which runs the clinic, says the indictments were a "painful reminder" of the deaths that unfolded last year.
Saenz was charged last May with two counts of aggravated assault for injecting bleach into two patients. Both lived.
The 35-year-old wasn't charged in any deaths until this week's indictments, which link her to five deaths

Headline: Woman Follows GPS, Gets Stuck In Snowmobile Trail
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 2.4.9
Caption: At least the GPS system did not send her over a cliff

A motorist relying on a GPS navigation unit found out the hard way that technology is not always the answer. Sheriff's officials said a woman was driving when the best routing from the GPS sent her onto a road that forked into a snowmobile trail. Several miles down the frozen path she stopped and couldn't turn around in about a foot and a half of snow surrounding the car. ..

Nothing Like Training Your Child

Headline: Cops: Convenience Store Robber Brings Daughter, 9
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 1.4.9
Caption: Nothing Like Training Your Child

A Washington state convenience store robbery suspect brought his 9-year-old daughter along while he committed the crime, the local sheriff said.

Robert Daniel Webb, identified as the suspect by Kittitas County detectives using store security video, pulled a gun on a clerk at the Ellensburg AM-PM while a girl in a pink coat watched.

The child is named as Webb's daughter, Meadow.

The renegade dad fled with about $200 and his little girl, driving east on I-90, according to the sheriff's office.

He and Meadow are believed to be traveling in a 2008 silver Toyota Corolla, Washington license 602-XQG.

Headline: 'Sorry' Note Left Near Texas Hit-and-Run Victim
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 1.4.9
Caption: The Sad Irony of the World

LEAGUE CITY, Texas — Police in League City, Texas, say a hit-and-run driver in a fatal crash apparently left a note expressing remorse near the victim's body.

An investigator who asked to be identified only as Detective Aldridge said Tuesday that no arrests have been made in the death of 34-year-old Maurice Jones.

The note was scribbled on paper from a spiral notebook. Aldridge says the note may have been written by a woman but he declined to reveal more details.

Headline: Men can 'laugh women into bed' with GSOH, say psychologists
Origin of Clip: telegraph.co.uk 1.4.9
Caption:Laughing all the way

"The findings provide evidence that women use humour as an indication of a guy's intelligence.

"Intelligence is a very attractive quality as a clever man should be more able to provide resources for his offspring.

"But guys be warned: not just any gag will do. We discovered that the humour must be genuinely funny for the man to be judged as more intelligent."

James Corden, the comedy star of BBC hit Gavin and Stacey, has said that being funny helped him to attract women from his teenage years onwards.

“My weight was never a concern for me. I could always talk to them and make them laugh, so they tended to overlook my physical imperfections,” said Corden, who is currently dating actress Sheridan Smith.

To rate the attractiveness of a sense of humour in the study, 45 heterosexual women were asked to read shorts descriptions of themselves compiled by 20 men, 10 of which were scored ss extremely funny and 10 as only slightly funny..

Headline: Sick city thrilled by violent crash deaths
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 1.4.9

Caption: Gravely SICK!! One of the most shocking accounts we have posted on this blog

... (Event 1) When a young mother crashed into a tree at Burwood, in Sydney's west, on Monday night her male loved-one ran to the car, pulling at the door in a desperate attempt to try to free her while her head slumped over. The woman, thought to be in her 30s, died instantly. Still he pulled at the door as the car started to smoke. He was screaming for help but some of the residents just walked out of their homes and stared.....(Event 1 ends)

(Event2)...Three hours later, a truck flipped at Yagoona in Sydney's southwest. The impact of the crash crushed the middle-aged male driver of the prime mover carrying a shipping container. Hanging upside-down, his legs gripped in the twisted metal, the dying man screamed in pain and yelled "help, help, help" to a crowd assembling at the roadside....(Event 2 ends)

(Events 1 & 2 summary)..They died as mothers in pyjamas and dressing gowns watched on with dozy toddlers. As teenagers strutted around the crime scene, exhilarated, to see tragedy unfold. Sirens and flashing blue-red lights of emergency cars or as one youth says, "the party vans" lured them to the scene. They jostled to find a clearer view. They laughed, maybe at a private joke, and took photographs. The bodies were still in view. Gore porn. Crash victims too often die, not only in excruciating pain but as a public spectacle. The final screams of a dying man, the last breath of a dying woman, in front of a thrilled audience murmuring at the horror of it all, yet sipping from a mug of hot coffee as they move closer to the action. "He was screaming, he was yelling for help," one man said at the scene. Theirs was a grim end. They died and crowds stared, shocked and open-mouthed, or wide-eyed and jovial and did little to help..... At both scenes there were good Samaritans.....but one could give the crash victims the dignity of dying without spectators, their children in tow, treating crime scenes as movie theatres with snacks and drinks. Because the last thing that the dying victims saw was just that.

Headline: Moms Swap Toddlers After Hospital Baby Mix-Up
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 31.3.9
Caption: Swap Meet

Two mothers in Russia have been forced to swap their two-year-old sons after DNA tests revealed the children had been mixed up as newborns by a careless nurse.
A court ordered the two heartbroken women to exchange the boys they had raised as their own, according to Russian media reports.
The error was uncovered when one of the mothers, Anna Androsova, discovered her son's maternity ward ID tag actually had the mother's name Zarema Taisumova on it.
Androsova tracked down the Chechen woman, saw the blue-eyed boy and declared, "This is my son."
But Taisumova refused to swap the children, dismissing the claims of physical resemblance.
The hospital in central Russia ordered DNA tests, which came back with definitive results — the boys had been mixed up.
Androsova initially pleaded with her family to keep Nikita, the boy she had raised for two years as her own.
But she later decided to pursue the exchange through the court.
Weeks after the switch, Taisumova was still deep in shock, interviewed on Russian television with her biological son playing on her lap.

Headline: Sneezing Fit Causes Driver To Crash Into Ore. Home
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 31.3.9
Caption: He Sneezed

Add sneezing while driving to the list of potential safety hazards. Authorities said a sneezing fit caused 25-year-old Ramon Stephen Ayala to lose control of his vehicle Saturday and hit a home. Marion County Sheriff's Office Cmdr. Kevin Schultz said Ayala sneezed as he headed toward an intersection around 1 a.m.

When he stopped sneezing, he had run a stop sign and tried to hit the brakes. But it was too late. Ayala's 2001 Volkswagen Jetta crashed into a corner of a house.

He Sneezed

Headline: Sneezing Fit Causes Driver To Crash Into Ore. Home
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 31.3.9
Caption: He Sneezed

Add sneezing while driving to the list of potential safety hazards. Authorities said a sneezing fit caused 25-year-old Ramon Stephen Ayala to lose control of his vehicle Saturday and hit a home. Marion County Sheriff's Office Cmdr. Kevin Schultz said Ayala sneezed as he headed toward an intersection around 1 a.m.

When he stopped sneezing, he had run a stop sign and tried to hit the brakes. But it was too late. Ayala's 2001 Volkswagen Jetta crashed into a corner of a house.

Headline:Moped thief busted at petrol station
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 31.3.9
Caption: Moped Thief

A MAN who stole a moped and rode it more than 340km on Sunday was only caught after he refused to pay $4.49 for petrol.

Police allege a 29-year-old man stole the moped from Townsville, North Queensland before setting off on his 348km trip, which was also subject to several calls from motorists complaining to police about a slow motorbike on the Bruce Highway.

Innisfail police Inspector David Tucker said the moped's would have struggled over the Cardwell Range.

"It would have been a slow journey up that hill," he said. "Motorists were complaining about a slow motorbike beforehand and shortly after that this call came in from the petrol station."

Headline: Burglars break into house, steal bear
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 31.3.9
Caption: Thieves nabbed stuffed bear of the real kind

POLICE are hunting a full-sized, stuffed brown bear stolen at the weekend.
Somebody smashed a window and forced open a door to steal the $5000, 1.5m tall stuffed bear from from the home in nothern Adelaide suburb of Wingfield.

The theft is believed to have occured between 8pm on Friday and 5pm Saturday.

Headline: Pimp Paid Teen Prostitute With Chicken Nuggets
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 30.3.9
Caption: Nothing Like Cheap Pimp

A 27-year-old Australian man who pimped a 16-year-old girl so he and his girlfriend could afford their apartment, would pay the schoolgirl with chicken nuggets, the Australian Associated Press reported.

Ronald Vikash Gander used the $4,500 the teen made for having sex with five middle-aged men in June of last year to pay the weekly $1,050 rent on his Brisbane apartment, the Brisbane District Court was told.

Gander and his 16-year-old girlfriend would pay the teen with an occasional box of chicken nuggets, the AAP reported.

"The girl was used as if she was a piece of meat ... and your conduct can properly be described as that of a sleaze merchant," Judge Marshall Irwin told Gander.

Headline: Cops Stop Neighbors Trying to Save Family From Fire
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 30.3.9
Caption: Sad Most Cops Would Risk Their Lives to Save Someone

A pregnant British woman, her husband and their 3-year-old son were killed in a house fire early Sunday as police who arrived before the fire brigade prevented neighbors from trying to save them.

“Please save my kids," the woman screamed from a bedroom window and neighbors tried to help but were beaten back by flames and were told by police not to attempt a rescue.

By the time firefighters got into the house in Doncaster, Michelle Colly, 25, her husband, Mark, 29, and son, Louis, 3, were dead. Their daughter, Sophie, 5, was taken to hospital and believed to be critically ill.

Headline: Mad cow expert may have died from disease
Origin of Clip: CNN.com 29.3.9
Caption: How Ironic

A Spanish pathologist who specialized in a human strain of mad cow disease died Saturday, and officials suspect the disease played a role in his death, officials said.

The doctor was head of the anatomy pathology section at the University Hospital Principe de Asturias in Alcala de Henares, outside of Madrid, according to the Madrid regional government's health office. He died Saturday night, at the hospital where he worked, officials said. The doctor's name was not released at the request of his family.

Headline: Driver Begs Cops To Shoot Him After 130 Mph Chase
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 28.3.9
Caption: Just Shoot Me

A police chase that exceeded speeds of more than 130 mph ended when the driver crashed and begged officers to shoot him. Police used a stun gun Friday morning on the man, who faces charges of driving under the influence, fleeing and eluding, aggravated assault by motor vehicle and resisting arrest.

Police say an officer tried to stop the man on Ga. 400 for speeding about 1:45 a.m., but he sped away in his Mercedes C230. He left Ga. 400, went westbound in the eastbound lanes of Old Milton Parkway, forcing oncoming drivers off the highway. He sideswiped a police car, lost control and slammed into a tree.

Fingering

Headline: Man Puts Finger In Gas Tank, Gets Stuck For Hours
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 27.3.9
Caption: You Gotta Watch Where You Stick Your Finger.

A Michigan man has learned not to stick his fingers in certain places. Victor Harris, of Saginaw, Michigan, was pouring a fuel additive into his Lincoln Navigator sport utility vehicle Thursday when a piece of paper fell into the gas tank. Harris tried to fish the paper out, but his index finger became stuck in the gas tank. WJRT-TV reported Harris tried to extract his digit for two hours before friends called the fire department. It took another two hours before emergency responders cut the gas tank tube out of the vehicle

Headline: Wash. Police Chief Checks Blackberry, Hits Car
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 27.3.9
Caption: Rather a dumb move too

The police chief of the south Seattle suburb of Federal Way has issued a public apology for a minor traffic accident that happened while he was checking his BlackBerry in his unmarked police car.

Headline: Man Tosses Gas Bomb In Fight, Sets Own Cars Ablaze
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Rather a dumb move

Authorities said a man threw a Molotov cocktail at his neighbor's trailer, but the wind shifted and set fire to two cars, a pickup and a travel trailer in the man's own yard. The Florida Highway Patrol reported that a 51-year-old man got into a fight with his neighbor on Tuesday night and threw the makeshift gasoline bomb..

Headline: Rumors Bites! Headmaster Denies Vampires At School
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Taking The Bite Out Of It

Apparently, it's not the bloody truth. After stories spread that vampires were strolling the campus of Boston Latin School, the headmaster of the prestigious college-prep school put a stake in the rumors. Lynne Mooney Teta sent a notice out Thursday to faculty, students, and parents denying the presence of bloodsuckers. She declined, however, to offer details about the rumors.

Boston Police spokesman Eddy Chrispin said police were called to the school Wednesday after hearing of the vampire tales. Chrispin said he didn't know if the alleged vampires were among the student body or hiding in old corners of the building.

Headline: Doctors Reattach Man's Arm After 900-Pound Pig Attack
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Porked

CLOVIS, N.M. — A 26-year-old Curry County man had his arm nearly severed by a 900-pound boar that attacked him when he reached into the animal's pen to grab a water hose.

Curry County sheriff's deputies say Juan Cruz, a dairy worker, was attacked March 16 when he was feeding the boar and about 18 other pigs at his home in rural eastern New Mexico.

Cruz, speaking through an interpreter, says doctors in Lubbock, Texas, reattached his arm, but he is waiting to see if the operation was successful.

Cruz says the pig wasn't mean and the attack was unexpected.

Headline: Man Gets 90 Days In Jail In Vacuum Sex Act Case
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Nothing Like Good Suction

Man Accused Of Performing Sex Act With Car Wash Vacuum Sentenced To 90 Days In Jail

Rather a dumb move

Headline: Man Tosses Gas Bomb In Fight, Sets Own Cars Ablaze
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Rather a dumb move

Authorities said a man threw a Molotov cocktail at his neighbor's trailer, but the wind shifted and set fire to two cars, a pickup and a travel trailer in the man's own yard. The Florida Highway Patrol reported that a 51-year-old man got into a fight with his neighbor on Tuesday night and threw the makeshift gasoline bomb..

Headline: Rumors Bites! Headmaster Denies Vampires At School
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Taking The Bite Out Of It

Apparently, it's not the bloody truth. After stories spread that vampires were strolling the campus of Boston Latin School, the headmaster of the prestigious college-prep school put a stake in the rumors. Lynne Mooney Teta sent a notice out Thursday to faculty, students, and parents denying the presence of bloodsuckers. She declined, however, to offer details about the rumors.

Boston Police spokesman Eddy Chrispin said police were called to the school Wednesday after hearing of the vampire tales. Chrispin said he didn't know if the alleged vampires were among the student body or hiding in old corners of the building.

Headline: Doctors Reattach Man's Arm After 900-Pound Pig Attack
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Porked

CLOVIS, N.M. — A 26-year-old Curry County man had his arm nearly severed by a 900-pound boar that attacked him when he reached into the animal's pen to grab a water hose.

Curry County sheriff's deputies say Juan Cruz, a dairy worker, was attacked March 16 when he was feeding the boar and about 18 other pigs at his home in rural eastern New Mexico.

Cruz, speaking through an interpreter, says doctors in Lubbock, Texas, reattached his arm, but he is waiting to see if the operation was successful.

Cruz says the pig wasn't mean and the attack was unexpected.

Headline: Man Gets 90 Days In Jail In Vacuum Sex Act Case
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Nothing Like Good Suction

Man Accused Of Performing Sex Act With Car Wash Vacuum Sentenced To 90 Days In Jail

Headline: School to Parents: Dead Daughter Can't Go to Prom
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 25.3.9
Caption: How can a dead person go to school?
We are not making fun of the death. We are making fun of the stupid school.

The parents of a British teen, who died suddenly two months ago, received a disturbing letter from the girl's high school saying she needs to improve her attendance or can't go to the prom, the Manchester Evening News reported.

The letter said Megan Gillan's attendance was 60.4 percent and the school requires its students to keep a 92 percent attendance record.

"I screamed when I first saw it," her mother Margaret Gillan told the newspaper. If they want her to attend that much I'll take Megan's remains. It's disgusting."

Gillan was found dead Jan. 19 in her bedroom at her parent's home. The letter was dated March 16.

Headline: Driver Says GPS Unit Led Him to Edge of Cliff
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 25.3.9
Caption: GPS Gets Mean

A British driver has blamed his GPS navigation unit for leaving his car teetering on the edge of a cliff after he followed its instructions.

Robert Jones said he trusted his navigational system and continued to follow it when it told him the steep, narrow footpath he was driving on was a road.

Jones, from Doncaster, South Yorkshire, northern England, now has a court date for driving without due care and attention.

His BMW nearly plunged down a 100-foot cliff in Todmorden, West Yorkshire, on Sunday

Headline: Family Visits Wrong Gravesite For 24 Years Following Cemetery Mix-Up
Origin of Clip: citynews.ca 25.3.9
Caption: Sad really

For the past 24 years a Toronto family has been visiting a gravesite they believed held the remains of their great grandfather. It turns out they have been laying flowers, and prayers, down at the plot of a total stranger.

... she brought her mother's ashes to be buried with her great grandfather at Resthaven Memorial Gardens on Monday.

When she arrived she found a new marker in his usual spot, and was then told that his grave was actually in another location.

"He came out said 'No, you're confused, you're upset, It happens to people.' I said, 'No, I am not. I know where I have been doing for 24 years..." **** said.

"We've been bringing flowers every birthday, every Father's Day, Christmas. And we've been visiting him and it's not even him."

Headline: Romantic Teen Seeks Prom Date, Gets Cops Instead
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 25.3.9
Caption: Spray Painted Romance Gets Tainted

A South Carolina teen's romantic gesture has won him the attention of police and environmental officers. Authorities told The Island Packet of Hilton Head that the 18-year-old man was caught spray painting the word "prom" on the beach near the home Sunday of the young lady he wanted to take to the dance. A neighbor had called police.

Deputies made the teen clean the area, but did not file any charges.

The spray paint cans were sent to environmental officials to see if the chemicals pose any harm to the beach.

Headline: Frantic 911 Call: "My Wife Is Biting Me!"
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 24.3.9
Caption: Help, I Need Someone

Some people will go to fisticuffs to get their point across, and others will go to, well, handcuffs, reports WCBS In New York.

Such was the case for a Fairfield woman having marital problems who desperately wanted to talk to her husband after he apparently decided to leave her.

Helen Sun, 37, was arrested Tuesday after sneaking into Robert Drawbough's bedroom and handcuffing herself to him while he slept so they could talk.

Drawbough, frightened by his wife's antics, however, called police immediately and begged the dispatcher for help after his wife began biting and scratching him.

Headline: Police Say Woman Used Fake ID To Get Fake Breasts
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 24.3.9
Caption: Fake and Flaky

Police are seeking a woman they said used a false identity to get breast implants and liposuction, then skipped town. Huntington Beach police said Monday that a 30-year-old woman opened a line of credit in someone else's name in September 2008 and had the procedures worth more than $12,000 performed at the Pacific Center For Plastic Surgery.

Headline: Spider-Man comes to boy's rescue
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 24.3.9
Caption: Spiderman Saves The Day Or Was That Mighty Mouse

A FIREMAN turned superhero when he dressed up as comic-book character Spider-Man to coax a frightened eight-year-old from a balcony, police say.
Teachers at a special needs school in Bangkok alerted authorities yesterday when an autistic pupil, scared of going to lessons, sat out on the third-floor ledge and refused to come inside, a police sergeant said.

Despite teachers' efforts to beckon the boy inside, he refused to budge until his mother mentioned her son's love of superheroes, prompting fireman Sonchai Yoosabai to take a novel approach to the problem.

"My fireman rushed back to the fire station and took out his Spider-Man costume ... The boy immediately ran into his arms with a smile,'' Sergeant Virat Boonsadao said.

Headline: Parrot Awarded for Yelling About Choking Baby
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 24.3.9
Caption: Parrot is a Hero

DENVER — A parrot that alerted his owner about a baby who was choking was recognized as a hero by the Red Cross.

Willie the parrot was given the Animal Lifesaver Award during the "Breakfast of Champions" event attended by Gov. Bill Ritter and Mayor John Hickenlooper.

Willie received the award Friday for his actions in November, when he and owner Megan Howard were baby-sitting a toddler. Willie repeatedly yelled "Mama, baby" when Howard went to the bathroom and the toddler started to choke on her breakfast.

Porked

Headline: Doctors Reattach Man's Arm After 900-Pound Pig Attack
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Porked

CLOVIS, N.M. — A 26-year-old Curry County man had his arm nearly severed by a 900-pound boar that attacked him when he reached into the animal's pen to grab a water hose.

Curry County sheriff's deputies say Juan Cruz, a dairy worker, was attacked March 16 when he was feeding the boar and about 18 other pigs at his home in rural eastern New Mexico.

Cruz, speaking through an interpreter, says doctors in Lubbock, Texas, reattached his arm, but he is waiting to see if the operation was successful.

Cruz says the pig wasn't mean and the attack was unexpected.

Headline: Man Gets 90 Days In Jail In Vacuum Sex Act Case
Origin of Clip:CBSnews.com 26.3.9
Caption: Nothing Like Good Suction

Man Accused Of Performing Sex Act With Car Wash Vacuum Sentenced To 90 Days In Jail

Headline: School to Parents: Dead Daughter Can't Go to Prom
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 25.3.9
Caption: How can a dead person go to school?
We are not making fun of the death. We are making fun of the stupid school.

The parents of a British teen, who died suddenly two months ago, received a disturbing letter from the girl's high school saying she needs to improve her attendance or can't go to the prom, the Manchester Evening News reported.

The letter said Megan Gillan's attendance was 60.4 percent and the school requires its students to keep a 92 percent attendance record.

"I screamed when I first saw it," her mother Margaret Gillan told the newspaper. If they want her to attend that much I'll take Megan's remains. It's disgusting."

Gillan was found dead Jan. 19 in her bedroom at her parent's home. The letter was dated March 16.

Headline: Driver Says GPS Unit Led Him to Edge of Cliff
Origin of Clip:FOXNews.com 25.3.9
Caption: GPS Gets Mean

A British driver has blamed his GPS navigation unit for leaving his car teetering on the edge of a cliff after he followed its instructions.

Robert Jones said he trusted his navigational system and continued to follow it when it told him the steep, narrow footpath he was driving on was a road.

Jones, from Doncaster, South Yorkshire, northern England, now has a court date for driving without due care and attention.

His BMW nearly plunged down a 100-foot cliff in Todmorden, West Yorkshire, on Sunday

Headline: Family Visits Wrong Gravesite For 24 Years Following Cemetery Mix-Up
Origin of Clip: citynews.ca 25.3.9
Caption: Sad really

For the past 24 years a Toronto family has been visiting a gravesite they believed held the remains of their great grandfather. It turns out they have been laying flowers, and prayers, down at the plot of a total stranger.

... she brought her mother's ashes to be buried with her great grandfather at Resthaven Memorial Gardens on Monday.

When she arrived she found a new marker in his usual spot, and was then told that his grave was actually in another location.

"He came out said 'No, you're confused, you're upset, It happens to people.' I said, 'No, I am not. I know where I have been doing for 24 years..." **** said.

"We've been bringing flowers every birthday, every Father's Day, Christmas. And we've been visiting him and it's not even him."

Headline: Romantic Teen Seeks Prom Date, Gets Cops Instead
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 25.3.9
Caption: Spray Painted Romance Gets Tainted

A South Carolina teen's romantic gesture has won him the attention of police and environmental officers. Authorities told The Island Packet of Hilton Head that the 18-year-old man was caught spray painting the word "prom" on the beach near the home Sunday of the young lady he wanted to take to the dance. A neighbor had called police.

Deputies made the teen clean the area, but did not file any charges.

The spray paint cans were sent to environmental officials to see if the chemicals pose any harm to the beach.

Headline: Frantic 911 Call: "My Wife Is Biting Me!"
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 24.3.9
Caption: Help, I Need Someone

Some people will go to fisticuffs to get their point across, and others will go to, well, handcuffs, reports WCBS In New York.

Such was the case for a Fairfield woman having marital problems who desperately wanted to talk to her husband after he apparently decided to leave her.

Helen Sun, 37, was arrested Tuesday after sneaking into Robert Drawbough's bedroom and handcuffing herself to him while he slept so they could talk.

Drawbough, frightened by his wife's antics, however, called police immediately and begged the dispatcher for help after his wife began biting and scratching him.

Headline: Police Say Woman Used Fake ID To Get Fake Breasts
Origin of Clip: CBSnews.com 24.3.9
Caption: Fake and Flaky

Police are seeking a woman they said used a false identity to get breast implants and liposuction, then skipped town. Huntington Beach police said Monday that a 30-year-old woman opened a line of credit in someone else's name in September 2008 and had the procedures worth more than $12,000 performed at the Pacific Center For Plastic Surgery.

Headline: Spider-Man comes to boy's rescue
Origin of Clip: news.com.au 24.3.9
Caption: Spiderman Saves The Day Or Was That Mighty Mouse

A FIREMAN turned superhero when he dressed up as comic-book character Spider-Man to coax a frightened eight-year-old from a balcony, police say.
Teachers at a special needs school in Bangkok alerted authorities yesterday when an autistic pupil, scared of going to lessons, sat out on the third-floor ledge and refused to come inside, a police sergeant said.

Despite teachers' efforts to beckon the boy inside, he refused to budge until his mother mentioned her son's love of superheroes, prompting fireman Sonchai Yoosabai to take a novel approach to the problem.

"My fireman rushed back to the fire station and took out his Spider-Man costume ... The boy immediately ran into his arms with a smile,'' Sergeant Virat Boonsadao said.

Headline: Parrot Awarded for Yelling About Choking Baby
Origin of Clip: FOXNews.com 24.3.9
Caption: Parrot is a Hero

DENVER — A parrot that alerted his owner about a baby who was choking was recognized as a hero by the Red Cross.

Willie the parrot was given the Animal Lifesaver Award during the "Breakfast of Champions" event attended by Gov. Bill Ritter and Mayor John Hickenlooper.

Willie received the award Friday for his actions in November, when he and owner Megan Howard were baby-sitting a toddler. Willie repeatedly yelled "Mama, baby" when Howard went to the bathroom and the toddler started to choke on her breakfast.